Day 15: You Don't Have to Know Everything

Updated: May 1, 2020

Tip #15:

Accept uncertainty as part of the deal.


These days, maybe more than ever before in our lifetimes, we are reminded how little we do know and how much less we control. Over the years, I have told clients attending my parenting classes, that if there's ever an experience that will train you as a Buddhist, it is being a parent. Being a parent during the coronavirus is like a crash course in acceptance and loving kindness.


As we change hats from professional to teacher and back again while toggling between maintaining the routine to processing the grim news of this pandemic, we must accept our limitations. I've already blogged about adjusting expectations several notches down from perfection. What I'm talking about now on Day 15 is more about accepting uncertainty as part of the deal.


Our uncertainty or confusion isn't a character flaw. There isn't something to do about it or someplace to go to find the answers. Instead, the answer lies in accepting that this is where we are right now. We make the best decisions based on what we know and what feels best for us and our families in the now, while acknowledging that we will likely change course again. And then again. And maybe again.


Our challenge is to adapt to the shifting sands underneath our feet with as much love and as much patience as we can muster at any given moment. It's okay not to know for sure or forever right now. In fact, it's advantageous to be with this chaos and these questions with a high degree of fluidity. When our kids ask "why" or "how much longer" tell them that we are taking it one day and one week at a time. That we, as their parents, are prioritizing their wellbeing and making adjustments, when necessary, to stay true to that plan.


I'm here to tell you, as much as I'm also reminding myself, that we don't have to know how it's all going to turn out when we do know that what we're doing right now, in this moment, is a true expression of our hearts.

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